You Pray. You Read Your Bible. So Why Are You Still Struggling?

I wish I could tell you that because I’m a therapist and someone who has followed Jesus for over thirty years that struggling eventually disappears. I wish I could tell you that anxiety, fear, uncertainty, and overwhelm eventually become things of the past.

But they don’t.

Anxiety has been something I have wrestled with for years. Not every day and not always with the same intensity, but enough that I know what it feels like to desperately want peace while simultaneously feeling afraid, overwhelmed, or uncertain. I know what it feels like to wonder why something that seems so simple for other people can sometimes feel so difficult.

There have been many mornings where I have sat at my kitchen table with coffee in hand, Bible open, carrying all the things that feel too heavy. Sometimes I come with specific worries. Sometimes I come with racing thoughts. Sometimes I come with fears that don’t even make sense. And sometimes I simply come tired.

One verse I repeatedly return to is from 2 Chronicles 20:12: “We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on You.”

I love this verse because it feels honest.

It doesn’t say, “We have everything figured out.”

It doesn’t say, “We aren’t afraid.”

It says: We do not know what to do.

And then it reminds us where to look.

If I’m honest, there have been many times I wished prayer would instantly remove anxiety. I wished reading the Bible would immediately create peace. I wished worship would magically make fear disappear.

Sometimes those things do help quickly. And sometimes they don’t.

What I have learned instead is that prayer, Scripture, and worship were never simply tools to make difficult emotions disappear. More often, they become reminders that I am not alone while I experience them.

One of my favorite quotes on fear comes from K.J. Ramsey:

“Fear is just courage’s preamble. When we practice remembering that the Spirit of Christ is our companion, fear simply becomes one more prompt to pay attention to the voice…of Love. Fear doesn’t have to be an enemy to conquer. It can be a place to be companioned by Love.”

For many years, I approached anxiety as something to fight, eliminate, fix, or conquer. While there are certainly skills, tools, and treatments that help—and I deeply believe in those things—I have also learned something else.

Sometimes healing begins when we stop asking, “How do I get rid of this feeling?” and start asking, “Where is God meeting me inside this feeling?”

As a therapist, I often meet with people carrying tremendous shame because they believe they should be further along.

If my faith were stronger, I wouldn’t feel this way. I should trust God more. Why am I still struggling with this?

But struggling is not evidence that you are failing spiritually.

Throughout the Bible we repeatedly see people who loved God deeply and still struggled deeply. David struggled. Elijah struggled. Job struggled. The disciples struggled. Paul struggled. And Jesus struggled.

Following Jesus does not exempt us from suffering. It means we do not suffer alone.

And sometimes God provides support through community, counseling, trusted relationships, medication, grief work, healing work, and simply allowing ourselves to admit that we are struggling.

So many mornings for me still look the same:

• I sit at my kitchen table.
• I open my Bible.
• I pray.
• I worship.

Not because my anxiety immediately disappears. But because God is still there.

Maybe today you simply need permission to stop trying so hard to be okay. Maybe you need permission to pull up a chair at your own kitchen table, bring your fears honestly before God, and remember: You do not have to carry this alone. You are not abandoned. You are not failing. You may not know what to do. But you can keep your eyes on Him.

If you need support, please call the Renewing Life Center at 702-434-7290.

Jennifer Antonucci, M.A., LMFT, LCADC