How Can I Overcome This Addiction?
You don’t want to admit it but realize what you have is an addiction. You despise what you keep doing and you long to be free. But you don’t believe you can. You’ve tried to quit but stopped because it was such a hard road.
If you struggle with an addiction… whether it is to alcohol, drugs, pornography, gambling, shopping, unhealthy eating habits etc. you can find freedom. It takes hard work, but you can change. Everyone is capable of change.
I want to help you find courage to make the decision to try or to try again. Your freedom is worth it! Here are four important components for overcoming any addiction and maintaining sobriety. Take courage, you can do it!
1. BOUNDARIES: You need to create boundaries that will make it significantly more difficult to continue in the addiction. For example, someone overcoming an addiction to alcohol will take purposeful steps to make it increasingly more difficult to obtain alcohol. Appropriate boundaries might include removing alcohol from the home, avoiding places such as bars and pubs, and declining invitations to social gatherings where alcohol will be served. Of course, you cannot eliminate every avenue for pursuing an addiction, but the principle is to make it much harder to continue the activities you are trying to eliminate.
2. REPLACEMENT: We do not eliminate unwanted behaviors by simply trying hard to not do them. In fact, the way the brain is wired – the more you focus on not doing something the stronger the pull becomes. Instead, you need to focus on replacing the behavior. A replacement can be anything you find pleasurable. It might be hanging out with friends, doing something productive, going to the gym, playing sports, reading a great book, or cooking and eating a great meal. There should be things you look forward to and enjoy every day that act as a reward for you and your brain. Longer-term purposeful life goals can serve as an even stronger replacement.
3. SUPPORT: Research shows that we usually become like our friends. If your friends are leading a healthy lifestyle you are more likely to pursue health as well. If your friends value and pursue education, you will probably do the same. And unfortunately, if your friends are caught up in addictions you are likely to participate in similar addictions. This makes overcoming addiction incredibly hard because it may mean you need to change your group of friends. This is an extremely difficult choice because we like our friends, they are important to us and we care about them even if we are not very healthy together. But, you need friends who will support your decision to change out of your addictions which may mean finding new friends. This is one of the reasons why groups like AA, NA, and Celebrate Recovery are so helpful.
4. ASK GOD FOR HELP: The first couple of the twelve steps tell us we need to admit we are powerless over our addiction and come to believe that a power greater than ourselves can bring us to a place of restoration. I believe God will help you break free from the chains of addiction if you ask Him to help you.
Again, if you struggle with addiction you can make a change! It takes great courage and resolve but you can do it and these four tools are a part of the process. I strongly recommend you start the journey and don’t be afraid to ask for help along the way. Our counselors at Renewing Life are here to help you!